Plouasne — Côtes-d’Armor (Bretagne, France)
I want to be outside in the wonderful nature, but the weather is not inviting. Strong and stormy winds, often with rain. The sun only comes out in the afternoon. Too late. There’s nothing left of the day.
It’s been like this for three days. Every day that I can’t press my boots against the solid ground of a path feels like a lost day.
The week before, we were out and about almost every day. Hiking by the sea, strolling through a charming little village or walking between wide fields which, to my surprise, are very green.
I miss that. And that expresses itself in a pain that starts inside me and spreads to my body. I stretch or do a few yoga exercises. But what can that do against the agony in my soul?
Enduring is not my strength. Not now that I’m finally in the place I’ve been tugging at in my dreams for so long. “This is just the beginning”, she says to me. “We’ll be here for a while yet, we’ll see and experience so much more.”
And although a little peace and quiet would do me good, I can’t allow it and I can’t enjoy it. What is it that drives me, that never lets me rest?